So here we are in 2016. I have to say I am kinda glad, 2015 was one of those years for me that you can’t help but wish away. I was pleased to watch it slip by at the stroke of midnight. It’s not as though it was particularly tumultuous or challenging or depressing… it is just that I completely lost who I am… and that was a bit scary.
You see the first half of the year all of my ‘roles’ were stripped away. All those ways I identify myself as me were shaken up and I felt my foundation crumble a little. It culminated in me laying in my bed in the dark, tears on my cheeks and heaviness in my heart. I had a strong sense that I could walk out of my life at the moment and no one would notice – a bit melodramatic perhaps – but that was how I felt. After I allowed myself to feel the anger and grief around that I eventually noticed a welcoming sense of peace around it and then unbelievably, a sense of freedom. If I wasn’t any of those roles, if I didn’t wear those expectations and sense of obligation, I could be anything I wanted to be.
Of course I am not running away to be a gypsy or divorcing my husband and family but it did make me question why I couldn’t have that same sense of freedom in my present circumstances. This led me on a journey for the rest of the year that allowed me to re-examine and reconnect with my relationship to joy and grace and ultimately to Spirit. It was less about what I ‘do’ and more about how I ‘be’. It led me to step back from validation from those roles and into a stronger sense of self. I recognized that I am everything and nothing at the same time and that my specific walk on this Earth is the twist. And I have to say I like being a little twisted.
So how do we live as nothing and everything. Here are a few tips I garnered over my 2015 journey –
- Keep coming back to centre – in times of doubt, anxiety or confusion bring yourself, your awareness back to your centre (check in). Look at your ‘problem’ or ‘challenge’ from your true perspective (that is not influenced by others) and check in with your higher self. Allow your inner wisdom to guide you.
- Walk through life in loving detachment – We all have ‘roles’ that we play, but if you fill those roles without being attached to those roles then you can bring wisdom, perspective, humour and grace into how they are expressed. It is like watching yourself on stage, knowing that the real you is not affected by the drama happening.
- Cultivate interconnectedness – I know I am an energetic being, Spirit and science tell us this is so, as is everything else around us. Practising an awareness of this energetic connecting and mingling brings you closer to it all. Look through ‘God eyes’ and see people as their soul selves.
I hope your 2016 is also a year of discovery for you….
I have always enjoyed motor bikes, well sitting on the back of them anyway. I travelled across Australia on one, I recently did the Mae Hong Son loop in Thailand on one and my husband and I often go for Sunday rides. I know it’s not for everyone but I go into a ‘space’ on the back of a bike and enjoy the proximity of it – to my husband, the road and the environs. Well one day I just happened to mention to said husband, “I wonder what it would be like to actually ride the bike on my own”. Before you know it he had purchased a cheap (so if I damaged it, it wouldn’t matter) bike and I was off to the Big Pineapple car park for lessons with him. I can tell you it has been quite a journey and although I haven’t got my license yet, I am learning quite a lot about myself. The top 5 things I have learned while learning to ride a motor bike. Continue reading “The Zen of Motorbike Lessons” »
Regrets – we all have them. We carry them around like little pieces of coal that do a slow burn in our hearts and minds. They are laced with a subtle poison that eats away at our sense of wholeness and dreams for the future, because until we can let them go, if we ever, they anchor us in the past. Having regrets ensure that our personal power will never be at full throttle because they drain our energy like fuel from a leaky line. And they are persistent little buggers, holding on with hook like tendencies, catching us off guard and reminding us of our imperfections. Forgiving and forgetting can be a challenging process so I am sharing some ways to re-define regrets. We can take the negative energy usually associated with rambunctious regrets and turn it into something that will support you to be free. Continue reading “Re-defining Regrets” »
I have been having many conversations recently about Education, both with parents and teachers. I know that teachers are doing the best that they can with what they have but I really have to wonder whether the curriculum being dictated is serving the children it is meant to. I absolutely agree that we need literacy and numeracy but what about other subjects that are going to help children and young adults grow into productive, balanced, compassionate, resilient, motivated and happy adults? What about tools that will assist them to function and thrive in an increasingly difficult adult world. We all know that our childhood has a huge impact on how we relate and function as adults so let us give them the knowledge and tools to choose the life they want to live. Continue reading “We can’t possibly teach that – can we?” »
Recently I posted on facebook that I felt I had lost my mojo – I was feeling tired, down, unmotivated and a little bit joyless. What came back was a list of divine ways to help me retrieve it. I know I am not the only one who feels like this at times so I decided to share the suggestions just in case your mojo has gone walk about too. Now I know we can’t all take a gorgeous young Jamaican lover like Stella (Movie “How Stella Got Her Groove Back”) but these will help you to re-ignite a little mojo magic.
- Dance – ‘Dance like no one is watching’. Dancing with abandon allows us to release endorphins, to get out of our mind space and to get back into our bodies. Moving to a rhythm helps to reestablish our own and awakens the wild woman in us. We need her to bring passion to our lives.
- Listen to your body – They say that ‘the body is the barometer of the soul’ so listen to what it is whispering to you. Do you need more sleep, more ‘alive’ food, more movement? Is it craving yoga, walks, gym? Where are you hurting in your body, where are you holding stress? Let go!
- Rest and rejuvenate – We are so, so busy, so, so much that our rest time is often still filled with mind chatter and ‘to do’s’. When you rest and rejuvenate, do it properly. Try candles, a bath, soft music. Or a soft cushion, blanket and good book to get lost in. Perhaps a gentle walk in nature or quiet time beneath a tree. What ever you choose really relax. Go the whole hog.
- Travel – When you are out of comfort zone and experiencing the new, it can bring a fresh perspective to life. You can experiment with different aspects of self – the adventurous self, the bold self, the contemplative self, the talkative self, the spontaneous self. You may find that the self you discover wants to come back from your travels with you and express in your everyday life.
- Feel – Be quiet, be still, be open and feel. How do you truly feel – not the reaction – the response to life that is within you. What are your feelings telling you, guiding you, asking you to be or do? Our feelings are a great indicator of what is out of balance and what isn’t. Listen to the quiet voice of feeling and then make a choice – honour them or stay stuck.
- Write in a journal – Sometimes by actually having to formulate our thoughts into words we garner new insights into what is going on for us. Or just by opening a page and writing without agenda, the words flowing without censorship, we are surprised by the wisdom that we hold. Writing is freeing, releasing and insightful. What is your next chapter?
- Community – Spend time with people you love. We are all a part of a community – family, friends, interest groups. Ask people you trust what they love about you. Or volunteer your time and energy in the community. Giving to others is a wonderful way to bring you up and make you feel so much ‘greater’. You can get out of your own way.
- Meditate – Connecting to your Higher Self or Spirit always helps to put things into perspective. Quietening the mind allows space for your truth, your heart voice to speak to you. Ask for guidance and listen without thought to the answer.
- Diet – And I am not just talking about what you put in your mouth here. Of course healthy eating supports your whole being and creates a feeling of well-being but I am also talking about what you are reading, viewing, doing, the people you spend time with, your menu of thoughts and beliefs. Own your space -internally and externally – and be mindful of what you are digesting.
- Make love – Back to the lover! There is no better way to connect than with your sensuality and sexuality and especially if you share it with someone you care about. Even if that is yourself! Making love in all sense of the word is a divine experience and since you are divinity the mojo can’t help but kick on in. This is the ultimate in honouring you and another.
Now this is just a few ways of mojo-ing back. I am sure if you really tried you would find many more. If Stella can get her groove back then so can we and what fun in the process!